Wednesday, June 2, 2010

THE ART OF APPRECIATION

One of the most important life lessons that I am passing on to my children is the art of appreciation.  I literally mean the word a-p-p-r-e-c-i-a-t-i-o-n in every aspect of one's life.  I find that so many people are busy coveting what they don't have or focusing on what they wish they had that they never take a moment to truly appreciate the treasures they actually possess.  We often day dream or fantasize of a different life or a different "piece" to our lives that the real tangibles get overlooked.  I'm not talking about goals or aspirations either.  I am referring to those unhealthy "I hate my life" moments.  We've all had them and some of us more than others.  The real tragedy is when you so want something more that you fail to appreciate what you have.

There is something so peaceful about the ability to be content.  Life can be an endless treadmill to nowhere if you let it.  Why do we compare our own worth to someone else?  Why are our own standards determined by the actions of others?  Why is it that we are so afraid of being labeled that we force ourselves and our families to fit into a box that was constructed by other people's needs for approval?  The rush to keep up with others is an unfulfilling and exhausting waste of time.  It accomplishes absolutely nothing except to make you feel like less of a person.  It is a learned response to bad actions.

Take a few minutes either at the beginning or at the end of every day and list at least five things for which you are grateful.  My guess is that it will be difficult to stop at just five once you actually put pen to paper and can "see" the reality of your life before you.  The items on that list are often the very things that we take for granted... our health, our children's health, a job, a home, a car that starts each day or the comfort in knowing that you have a partner to share the ups and downs of life with.  When you take stock of what you DO have in life something amazing usually happens... you realize that there is actually very little that you are lacking.

Ultimately no one will remember what dress you wore to which party or what car you were driving two years from now.  Moments are what we remember rather than possessions.  Don't leave things undone and unsaid.  Rather than nagging your children about their socks on the floor, take a moment to remind them that they are your greatest accomplishment in life.  Instead of complaining about the way your husband loaded the dishwasher, just say thank you and mean it.  Before you go to sleep, tell everyone under your roof that you love them.  Those are the "things" that stay with us forever...