THE VALUE OF BEING A GOOD LISTENER

We've all heard the old cliche that people love to talk about themselves and most of the time it is the truth.  How many of us know people who are actually good listeners?  For me there is nothing more frustrating than to try to have a conversation with someone who asks me a question and then moves on to another topic before I've even had a chance to answer!  Ask yourself this question... When someone is talking to you are you truly engaged in what they are saying or are you already thinking about what YOU want to say next and actually just pretending to listen.  Do you give the other person eye contact or are you distracted?  If you answered yes to either one then you might not be a very good listener.

The good news is that it's never too late to learn how to be a better communicator.  The problem most often is that we are usually distracted by the many other things going on either around us or in our heads.  We are so used to having to "multi task" to get through the day that we often multi task through our conversations and relationships suffer in the process.  If someone wants to have a conversation with you and you don't have the time to give them your full attention, give them the courtesy of letting them know that and offer to postpone the conversation until you can actually focus on the conversation.  Realize that you aren't doing anyone any favors by pretending to be engaged in a conversation.

Remember also that you are a living example to your children every day.  The way you interact with them is the way they will interact with the world.  Teach them how to be good communicators through your example with them.  If you are the one who is always talking then chances are you actually absorb very little information.  There is much more to be learned by listening in almost every circumstance.  The art of listening is also a good character trait.  It demonstrates self restraint, kindness, generosity and compassion.  By observation these are traits which are lacking in society today.  If everyone took the time to slow down and consider someone else we would greatly improve the quality of our OWN lives in the process simply by default...

"It is better to be silent and be thought ignorant than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln